Weigh in Wednesday: Raw

Today (Tuesday) was kind of a yucky place in my head.  I got dressed for the gym after work and I just hated what I saw in the mirror.  That's something I hate to even admit because I dislike the thought of anyone  ever having that thought.  It's awful.  And every time I have to take a break from working out, I get this way.  It makes my soul sad, it makes it feel raw.

I had to take the last week off from the gym because I jacked my ankle up running the 5K I did a little over a week ago.  I know that logically my ankle needed the rest and that 1 week of not working out isn't going to make me blimp out to a million pounds requiring a whale stretcher to move my massive being.  I know that.  It unfortunately doesn't change what I see looking in the mirror or how I feel.  What I hate most is that my brain at some point got wired this way.

Now, I know I'm passed starving myself but I caught myself thinking in the car on the way home from the gym about going out for a long run...even though I'd just done an hour of zumba.  It frustrates me to no end that I even have thoughts like that.  I need to refocus on heath.  I need to have goals of getting healthier and a better version of myself-physically and mentally not think about numbers on scales or what I think I look like in a mirror.

Until I get back to my happy place, here are some pictures from the Rave Run.


 

Hi Lo

(IAMDYNAMITE)

Does anyone else feel like you're totally screwed up about what season it is?!  I keep thinking it's spring, just barely, not almost summer.  If we keep going from 50 to 90 to 40 to 70 my brain might explode.  

To add to that confusion here are some lost pre-Christmas outfit pictures.

 Earrings: Betsey Johnson

Top: Macy's

Pants: Elle

Shoes: Target

Cutest puppy ever: Miss Piper.

 This summer, for real, I want to figure out once and for all, a year after I first started saying it, how to get back to my old blogging self.  I know everyone seems to at some point take a blogging sabbatical, or at least since I started reading blogs a few years ago, and I never was able to bring myself to give it up totally but I more or less have, if you go by the numbers of comments and readers I have.  I'm thankful the numbers didn't plummit like I thought they might but it still makes me sad that I'm not meeting new bloggy friends and that I'm not getting to keep up with all my favsies like i used to.  I know I bring it up every few months but I really want to commit to getting into a new and better groove.

Step 1...getting back to lots of outfit posts (since that's what I like blogging about most)...I'm trying to think of some new and creative ways to talk about the clothes I love.  Any ideas?!  

Also, wtf, am I a zombie?!

Xo Lori

Makeup Monday: Some of my new Favsies

So, with my birthday and birthday monetary gifts, I've gone on a bit of a makeup and hair product binge.  It's been pretty successful too, I must say.  I thought I would share some of my new recent finds and favsies!

1.  Pssssssst Dry Shampoo (I got it at Ulta):

     

       -Hands down best dry shampoo I've ever used.  And super cheap.

2.  Loreal Everstyle Beach Spray AND Bumble and Bumble (Ulta and Sephora)

Verdict.  I love them both.  But honestly I get 3x as much Everstyle as BB spray and it's 1/3 the price...

I just can't argue with seeing very similar results and the giant price difference!  Also, L'Oreal's ever line is 100% vegan and non-animal tested.  Even if the rest of their products are, I can sleep slightly easier knowing that the specific products I'm buying aren't tested on animals (I also secretly hope that by buying their vegan versions it will show them that there is a market for doing the right thing).

3.  Alba Good & Clean Daily Detox Foaming Cleanser (Target)

     

-under $10, vegan, smells good, and seems to be working well on my skin.  Alba FTW.  I highly recommend.

4.  Revlon Color Stay Ultimate Suede in Finale [not the color pictured] (Target)

  Most excellent and in looking at it on my lips vs pics on Lime Crime I think it's pretty darn similar to the velvetines...or at least will do until I can get my hands on the red velvet one.

5.  Loreal the balm  in any color (but especially in Rose Elixer)

 Best non-high end brand lip product period.

6.  NYX Collection Noir liner in Black Matte  

-Super long lasting, looks fantastic, cheap town, twists up instead of sharpening, and not tested on animals!

7.  Revlon PhotoReady Shadow and Primer in Metropolitan [Not the color pictured] (Ulta)

 

 Effing brilliant.  I actually now keep this in my desk drawer at work if I don't have time to do my makeup before I leave for work.  Is it the best ever quality eyeshadow...no...but for the price, it's awesome!

8.  Urban Decay Moondust shadow in Diamond dog (Sephora)

-simply stunning.  Perfect shimmery brown.

(Diamond Dog, NYX Noir Liner, Rose Elixer The Balm)

What new products have you tried?!

Xo Lori

Riot in the Neon Light

(IAMDYNAMITE)

I hope you weren't expecting a serious post today.  Well actually this shit is serious.  A little over a week ago my domestic partnership with my cellular device came to a quick and painful end.  You see, while going down to lunch with me at work, my phone decided it wanted to leap out of my pocket and straight into the toilet I was about to use.    

I guess on the plus side I hadn't used said toilet and at least the bowl was clear.  In my slow-mo panic I reached for my bestie-electronic device and well, I'm just gonna own it, I totally stuck my hand right in the  throne and fished that bitch out.  I proceeded to then wipe it down with antibacterial soap, and dry it with paper towels.  Amazingly it turned back on and with only minimal wonkiness.  As soon as I got home I did the bag of rice trick (FALLACY I TELL YOU!) which is clearly no trick at all and within a day the screen no longer felt the need to function.  Unfortunately, when I can't use it, my battery guzzler of a phone lasts for days and liked to be a spiteful jerk and let me know everytime someone called, texted, emailed, or otherwise notified me of things.  Oh and did I mention the daily alarms.  Le Sigh....and a facepalm, hard.

After of few days of being cut off from the world (and my camera-YIKESSSS x5000) I finally broke down and conceded that my phone wasn't coming back from the watery grave it found at the MN Dept. of Revenue.  After Sprint was so kind to inform me that a replacement of my phone out of renewal would be $700 and that the cheapest smart phone would cost us $350 we decided to be craigslist creepers and buy a phone that way.  Thankfully a slightly used version of my phone was within my possession and activated by the next day.  Ahh first world problems.  Looking back a week and a half later, this seems beyond silly.  I mean seriously, it wasn't that long ago that I didn't even own an emergency cell phone but I swear you would have thought I'd lost a family member.  Thankfully phones can be bought and reactivated.  

So lesson of the day:  If you take your phone to the bathroom, make sure it is SECURE in your pocket or else lay it on the dang toilet paper roll holder...anything but precariously stowing it in a blazer pocket.  Shit happens.  

Top and Shoes: Target

Pants: Kohls

Necklace: Modcloth

I love it

(Icona Pop)

Top, Gloves, and Boots: Target

Jeans: LC

Purse: Coach

Hat: H&M

Necklace: Juicy Couture

Bobby Pin: Modcloth
Lipstick: Lime Crime Glamour 101

 So on Friday night I ran my first 5K (ok, full disclosure, it was just a fun run AND they shortened the course a bit) but in any case, I went, I ran, I finished, and now I really want to try a non-fun-run 5k.  It also actually made me want to start training for a 10k.  I think I'll do it.  I spent a week and a half running outside to prep for the 5-er and was glad to find that despite not having run outside since last June, I was still able to average about a 10 minute mile on 3-ish mile runs.

Not that a 10 minute mile is anything to be happy about, at least not for me, but I was totally expecting worse.  And even better was the fact that I didn't even end up getting too winded at the Rave Run!  Booms.  So, that's a bucket list item I can check off (although if I want to get super specific, I really still haven't as an adult run a 5k...stupid shortened course).  

Do you do races regularly?  Do you prefer fun runs or race-races.   What length race to do you prefer to run?  Lets talk runnin.  Go:  

Twenty-eight

Twenty Eight started off a little shaky but all in all, so far so good?!  Twenty Seven was an especially challenging year for me.  I had all kinds of wonderful amazing things happen, and I have so many great memories from the last year of my life but at the same time, I changed jobs, Jimmy passed away, I had my gallbladder surgery and the financial stresses of unexpected big home repairs and maintenance having to be done right after were a lot to handle.  All I can think is without my family, friends, coworkers, and all of the positive influences on my life, I don't know how I would have made it through without going a little coo coo banana pancakes.  

Twenty eight started with a stop at Mc Donalds on my way to work for a sugar free vanilla iced coffee (one of my fave treats ever!) that ended with me waiting 15+ minutes for said coffee and getting to work late.  #fail.  On top of that I super tripped on my way into work and already had multiple missed calls before I was even supposed to be in for my regular work hours.  Luckily though, that was the extent of my bad luck for the day so fingers crossed that that was not an omen of the year to come...

I was showered with love and thoughtful messages, cards, sweet little gifties, and phone calls.  I don't know why this year seemed so much more like I received one big giant metaphorical hug all day but really, that's what it felt like.

I finished off my annual day of birth celebration with an amazing Hibatchi dinner at Osaka with some of my favorite people.  It was so much fun and was kind of amazing to see friends from different parts of my life finally meeting and even better, getting along cray well!  

The cherry on top of my day was for sure the sweet, thoughtful, and downright amazing gifts from Randall.  He really surprised me and went all out for what really was a pretty unimportant birthday and again, I just needed it.  The last few months especially have been so hard and with the weather being so awful for so long, it was exactly what I needed to lift me out of the funk I was in.  I'm starting to feel like myself again and that, was absolutely the best b-day gift of all.

So family, friends, everyone that contributed to the amazing birthday I had, Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.  

Xo

Lori

Dont Stop...Color on the Walls

(Foster the People)
It continually amazes me how much some sunshine and warm weather can completely change my mood.  And inversely how much MORE snow and cold can swing it the other way, especially in May.  Yeah, you heard me, 30 degrees and snow in May.  Why the H do I live in MN?!  It's lucky the twin cities are AMAZING and that when it's nice out it's NICE out.

Here's the thing.  Much like the sudden weather change I'm forcing upon myself a complete and total attitude change.  I'm throwing around a lot of life possibilities and it's really been screwing with my head.  The past year has been work-awful.  That's no secret.  But the thing is, if I'm going to stick with it I need to just refocus on myself.  I need to be more selfish in that I need to care more for my soul, my heart, and even my mind.     I've been through worse, I'll probably go through far worse in my lifetime but really, I need to take control of how I feel now.  I spent years trying to be the best me I can be and then in one year I devolved into skating by...just trying to get through.  No more.

 Dress: Modcloth

Sweater: Thrifted

Tights: Target

Lipstick: Limecrime

Necklace: Juicy Couture

 I'm gonna fake it till I make it or until I know I've left to stone unturned, no avenue unexplored.  I'm going to separate work and life and focus again on getting into beast-fitness mode, make sure we plan delicious and healthy meals, and do more of the things I love, including blogging.

It's going beyond basic survival mode and living my life again.  Don't get me wrong, I've had a lot of wonderful and amazing things that have happened over the last year.  I've been happy.  I've made fantastic wonderful great memories, and ironically had one of the best years of my life.  It's the good things that have gotten me through and it's the good things I need to focus on. 

Thanks for sticking with me through all of this.  There really aren't words for how grateful I am for the family, friends, and bloggers who have supported me and who will continue to support me.  It's not easy to admit that you've really been failing at things but here it is, I've failed.  I've failed and I'm still alive, the Earth is still spinning, and I know I'm strong enough to get past this.  I swear.  I won't stop and I won't stop coloring on the walls.

XO Lori

To Infinity...

I got one of the best birthday presents ever this year.  My cousin and bestest Natalie booked a trip to come visit me 2 weekends before my birthday.  It had only been three months since I had last seen her but it felt like forever and yet as always things were as they always were, like it had been 2 days since we last hung out.  I love that I always feel like we don't even skip a beat.  The only indication of the fact that we only get to see each other every few months is the tears of joy and then the tears of sadness when I pick her up and drop her off.  

I thought about recapping the entire epic weekend for you guys but well let's face it...you'd get totes jelly and I don't want to make you feel like that!  I swear.  Promise promise.  But...I will tell you about some of my fave parts of the weekend.  

Sweater (left at my house by Nat-yeah I'm a jerk and wore it)

Top: Old Navy

Leggings: Simply Vera Wang

Belt: Thrifted

Shoes: Target

Lipstick: Revlon Suede lip stick in Celebration

After I picked Nat up from the airport we met up with Linny and went to Osaka for sushi.  Heaven.  I effing love sushi and to be able to sit down to an excellent sushi feast with two of my absolute fave ladies was pretty epic.  Linny had actually never had sushi before and it was pretty epic to introduce someone else to sushi, even if she didn't like it.  I feel like you either love or hate sushi, there seems to rarely be indifference for it.  We also got to sit and eat at the sushi bar, enjoy some sake and watch the chefs make some amazeballs creations (you know, the rolls I can't afford).  Oh and of course Linny got to use the childrens chopsticks which always makes me feel better about needing to use them the first like 5 times I got sushi!

We got back to my house pretty late but we stayed up and talked, made friendship bracelets, and watched Arrested Development.  Basically, the perfect evening.  I love that Nat and I can go out and get cray but we also have just as much fun watching movies or tv show seasons (ahem full house, fraggle rock, AD) on the couch eating yummy snacks and doing crafties.

Saturday I took Nat to her first ever Zumba class and then we got coffee at one of our fave coffee places, Amore, and did a little vintage shopping and our usual festival-o-salvation army.  After a shower we headed over to Holy Mackerel for Tattoos and Piercings.  Five hours, 2 new tattoos and a new piercing later, we found ourselves hauling ass to Target to get care supplies and ended up having the lights shut off on us...apparently they don't eff around on Saturday night, 11 pm means 11 pm, I was waiting for the "get out bitches" announcement (unfortunately it never came).  

Sunday was a typically Lor-Nat Sunday, target, Rusty taco, and then some of our fave Selby/Snelling shops.

Unfortunately Sunday evening came way to quickly and I found myself dropping Nat back off at the airport.  I may have cried on the way home.  And by may I totally did.  I get why right now we can't live in the same place BUT there really just aren't sufficient words for how much being around Nat just makes my soul feel like it's exploding with sunshine, glittler, and unicorns.  She and I are so similar but also so so different but in the best kinds of ways.  I can't even begin to describe how comfortable and happy I feel hanging out with her.  I can tell her anything without fear of judgement, she will call me on my shit but somehow never make me feel bad about myself.  She just gets me, and while I'm blessed to have many people in my life that I can always turn to, I just adore our friendship, our family bond, just everything about us together.  Nat is just an amazing, strong, hilarious, epically fantastic woman and human being.  I count myself so lucky to have her as a role model and support system and I don't know what I'd do without her in my life.  

So sorry for the gush fest but oh man do I miss my sista from another mista already and all I can think about is our next visit!  

Dear Natalie-

I love love love you to infinity and beyond!

Love, 

Lori

My Boyfriend's back

(The Ravonettes)

 I maintain there are few things that make me feel happier than florals, polka dots, and mint green things...oh and of course piper.

 I may or may not have worn this to work and I may or may not have gotten up and had imprompteau twirl time in my cube.

 Can we also just chitty chat about how much I can't wait to be able to take outfit pics outside again and more importantly to finally catch up on outfits...you know...that aren't from before Christmas.  I might have some posts like this coming up, short on works, just outfits I wanna b-log about.  It's totes legit, I promise.

Sweater, Shoes, Polka dot top: Target

Dress: Charlotte Russe

Belt: off a Ruche dress

Tights: Forever 21

Necklace: Gifty from Natalie for Christmas-garage sale find I thinks...

XO Lori

My Body

(Young and the Giant)

Let's catch up, shall we?

So my posts, they've been brief and far between and you know what, that's ok, because it has to be.  I need to remember that it's ok to be inconsistent because this is just for fun and even though I want to make sure my favsie readers don't stop reading, I just have to find balance whenever and wherever I can.  The last few weeks have been amazing, stressful, exciting, and everything in between.  So....no joke, bullet point list of the highlights:

 -My entire work-life turned upside down.  I'll continue to keep details to a minimum but lets suffice to say I am the last one standing in the sales ratio unit.  It meant nights with little sleep, panic attacks, many tears, and rants and general frustration and overwhelmedness (yeah I just made that word up, so?).

-I got a cold, that I couldn't for the life of me shake.  Ugh.  It was gross.

 -Then Natalie, my best friend, cousin sister favsie lady, came to visit me here in Saint Paul.  We had an epic weekend filled with thrifting, vintageing, coffee dates and zumba, arrested development and friendship bracelet making, sushi of course, PLUS

-We got new matching Tattoos:

-and I finally, after almost 9 years, got my nose repierced!

-I also celebrated my birth...the 28 occurrence of such celebration and it was in-freaking-credible.  I cannot begin to describe the gigantic hug I got from the universe on my b-day and I also cannot express how much my soul needed that.  But that's a gush fest for another post.

-In other work related news, my other half at work, Eric, had his last day this week and even though I've been expecting him to depart for a long time, it's still weird to suddenly not have the person you have spent 40 hours a week with all day erry day not be there.  I wish him nothing but happiness and success in his new job and I'm also hopeful that maybe this is a fresh starting point for sales ratio.  Fingers Crossed.

-There might also be another big change in the Milanowski household...no my eggo ain't preggo but hopefully I'll have some happy news to share soon.  Again, fingers crossed.

Top: Christmas Gifty from Natalie

Dress: Thrifted Forever 21

Belt: modcloth

Earrings & Tights: Betsey Johnson

Shoes: Target

XO Lori